Posts Tagged: you know you’re a…

25 ways to know you’re grown up

1. Your house plants are alive & you can’t smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 4. 06:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. 5. You hear your favorite song

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You may be a Unitarian Universalist if:

You think socks are too formal for a Summer service. You know at least 5 ways to say “Happy holidays!” Your idea of a guy’s night out is going to a N.O.W. rally. Unleavened bread is part of your Easter Brunch. You refer to construction paper as “paper of color.” The name of your church

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You Know You’re From Indiana When…

This page gets name-checked in a YouTube video critique of the list, from nthecgirl88. You’ve never met any celebrities. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway. "Vacation" means driving through Amish Country or going to the State Fair. You’ve seen all the biggest bands ten

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You Might Be A Yankee If:

You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside." You think Heinz Ketchup is SPICY! You don’t have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly. For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes au gratin to grits. You don’t know what a moon pie is. You’ve never had grain alcohol. You’ve never, ever, eaten okra. You eat

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You Know You Are From A Small Town If…

You were in 4-H. You know what 4-H is. You said the ‘f’ word and your parents knew within the hour. You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting. School gets canceled for state events. You have ever taken a trailer or dog to school. Your teachers calls you by your older siblings names. Your teachers

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You Know You Are No Longer A Kid If…

You’re asleep, but others worry that you’re dead. You can live without sex but not without glasses. Your back goes out more than you do. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room. You buy a compass for the dash of your car. You are proud of your

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You Know You Live in San Francisco When…

Your co-worker tells you they have eight body piercings – and none are visible. When someone says TENDERLOIN – you don’t think steak. You think danger. You make well over $100,000 and you still can’t find a nice place to live. You think anyone who drives a car to work is decadent. You keep a

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You Might Be a Republican if…

You think "proletariat" is a type of cheese. You’ve named your kids "Deduction one" and Deduction two" You’ve tried to argue that poverty could be abolished if people were just allowed to keep more of their minimum wage. You’ve ever referred to someone as "my (insert racial or ethnic minority here) friend" You’ve ever tried

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You Might Be A Redneck Goddess If…

Sounds special, doesn’t it? I think we are special, and hopefully you will too. Everyone has heard of rednecks by now, but traditional redneck humor either leaves out the ladies, or is incredibly harsh. Well, no more! Please read on – you may find yourself or someone you know!. You Might Be A Redneck Goddess

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You Might Be A Minnesotan If…

You measure distance in minutes. Weather is 80% of your conversation. Down south to you means Iowa. You call highways "freeways." Snow tires came standard on your car. You have no concept of public transportation. 75% of your graduating high school class went to the Univ. of Minnesota. You know more than 1 person that

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You Know You’ve Already Grown Up When…

1. Your potted plants stay alive. 2. You keep more food than beer in your fridge. 3. 6 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep. 4. You hear your favorite song on the elevator. 5. You carry an umbrella and watch the Weather Channel. 6. You don’t remember when Taco

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You Might Be A Goth If …

You pay 6 bucks for cigarettes that match your outfit You like to play dead in public You wake up still drunk at 3 in the afternoon with anonymous black lipstick on your face The shade of powder you wear is called "Sheet Of Paper" The Count was your favorite Sesame Street character as a

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You’re Lost Between "Baby Boomer" and "Generation X" If…

You remember when Jordache jeans with a flat-handle comb in the back pocket was cool. Any photograph of you shows you wearing an Izod shirt with the collar turned up. You know any "Weird Al" Yankovic songs by heart. You’ve ever rung someone’s doorbell and said "Landshark!" You were once bowled over by the technological

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You Know You’re Stuck in The 80’s If…

Your fondest childhood memory is when Skippy got his head stuck in the banister You relax by putting on your legwarmers and dancing to the "Footloose" soundtrack You think the Two Coreys are "totally awesome" You’re still bitter that Wham! broke up Punky Brewster is your hero You type all of your term papers on

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You Know That You Are Too Drunk When…

1. You lose arguments with inanimate objects. 2. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth. 3. Job interfering with your drinking. 4. Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream. 5. Career won’t progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts. 6. The back of your head keeps getting

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You Know You’re Not in College Anymore When…

You’re waking up at 6 am instead of going to bed. Beers at lunch get you reprimanded. College sweatshirts are ‘casual’ instead of dress up. Your parents charge rent. The four food groups are no longer beer, pizza, chips and cereal. It’s ‘getting late’ when it’s 9:30 p.m. Three words: Student Loan Payments. You make

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You Might Be a College Student If…

You have ever price shopped for Top Ramen, you might be a college student. You live in a house with three couches, none of which match. You consider Mac and Cheese a balanced meal. You have ever written a check for 45 cents. You have a fine collection of domestic beer bottles. You have ever

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You Know You’ve Had Too Much Coffee When

Juan Valdez names his donkey after you. You get a speeding ticket even when you’re parked. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. You sleep with your eyes open. You watch videos in fast-forward. You lick your coffeepot clean. Your eyes stay open when you sneeze. The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take

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