There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart, that you can’t take part. You can’t even passively take part! And you’ve got to put your bodies upon the gears and upon the wheels, upon the levers, upon all the apparatus, and you’ve got to
Read on »Favorite Quotes
Favorite Quotes: White Dude Mating Calls
It’s a tedious way of saying “Don’t make me feel bad for being an asshole”, which seems to be the mating call of a whole lot of white dudes. — from Women in Secularism 2: Breaking News: Even at WiS, we have to defend the purpose of WiS!
Read on »Thought for the week
Instead of assuming that people are dumb, ignorant, and making mistakes, assume they are smart, doing their best, and that you lack context. — Nicholas C. Zakas (@slicknet) February 10, 2013 This particular tweet has stuck in my head all week long because I need to remember it when I’m considering other folks and things
Read on »‘Actor’ Geena Davis in Denver: ‘Gender inequalities are deeply entrenched’
Denver Business Journal: ‘Actor’ Geena Davis in Denver: ‘Gender inequalities are deeply entrenched’. “We had, ‘I Dream of Jeannie,’ and ‘Bewitched,’” she said, noting that the bulk of those shows was spent on the men trying to stop the women from using their magical powers. “This happened in several of my marriages,” Davis said wryly.
Read on »Quotable
Stephanie, on why she doesn’t want to see Titanic in 3-D: I thought it was overhyped in the first place. And at the scene were the ship hits the iceberg, and the guy says “How long do we have?!” I looked at my watch and said “You have an hour and a half.”
Read on »Personal Truth
I’ve posted this quote before, but it came up in conversation recently, and I was struck again by how very beautiful it is. May Sarton, from Journal of a Solitude: “My own belief is that one regards oneself, if one is a serious writer, as an instrument for experiencing. Life–all of it–flows through this instrument
Read on »The 100 Greatest Movie Threats of All Time
Almost 12 minutes of the best threats ever to cross the silver screen. Lots to memorize here. And a handy list of all the movies the quotes are from is here.
Read on »Quote of the day
In the comments of this Jezebel article on a weird guy who hates Emma Watson on his blog: “Honestly who can hate Emma Watson? She’s yet to do one annoying thing in public and she’s as adorable as a bucket of kittens.” True dat. Leave the poor girl alone to get her degree, people.
Read on »ZEUGMA
“[She] went straight home in a flood of tears, and a sedan chair.” –Charles Dickens
Read on »I totally thought of it myself, I swear
Things you may hear me say soon: “There are chemicals in the brain called neurotransmitters…” 4 person douche canoe Sites I may link to from time to time: http://getyourownmotherfuckingblogasshole.wordpress.com/ Let Me Google That For You
Read on »Pay your damned taxes, deadbeat
“Personal property is the effect of society; and it is as impossible for an individual to acquire personal property without the aid of Society, as it is for him to make land originally. Separate an individual from Society, and give him an island or a continent to possess, and he cannot acquire… He cannot become
Read on »Conservatives
I don’t dislike conservatives as people, I just think the conservative ideology is morally and ethically bankrupt, utterly repugnant, intellectually stunted, and should be eliminated from the philosophical arena. Conservatives themselves are just fine, so long as they don’t either act on their conservative ideology or demand special privileges such as being able to vote.
Read on »Barack Obama on saggy pants
In an MTV interview – Obama tells you to pull up your pants. He does it more politely than I do to teenagers in target. Sway: Our next question comes from Eric out of Huntington Beach, California: “There are numerous cultures and subcultures in the United States today. Powers-that-be set statutes with monetary penalty on
Read on »David Sedaris on Undecided Voters
From this week’s New Yorker: Then you’ll see this man or woman– someone, I always think, who looks very happy to be on TV. “Well, Charlie,” they say, “I’ve gone back and forth on the issues and whatnot, but I just can’t seem to make up my mind!” Some insist that there’s very little difference
Read on »Obama’s Steady Hand
“It’s my belief that this is exactly the time when the American people need to hear from the person who in approximately 40 days will be responsible for dealing with this mess,” said Obama. “Part of the president’s job is to deal with more than one thing at once.”
Read on »Quote of the Day: Reform
Courtesy “O Brother Where Art Thou“: Reform? I’ll reform you, you soft-headed sonofabitch! How we gonna run reform when we’re the damn incumbent! Y’ignorant slope-shouldered sack a guts! Why we’d look like a buncha satchel-ass Johnnie-Come-Latelies braggin’ on our own midget! Don’t matter how stumpy! And that’s the goddamn problem right there – people think
Read on »Eliminationist Quotes from Conservative Voices
What, really, is eliminationism? It’s a fairly self-explanatory term: it describes a kind of politics and culture that shuns dialogue and the democratic exchange of ideas for the pursuit of outright elimination of the opposing side, either through complete suppression, exile and ejection, or extermination. Source: Eliminationism in America: Appendix “I tell people don’t kill
Read on »Woodie Guthrie on songwriting
“I hate a song that makes you think that you are not any good. I hate a song that makes you think that you are just born to lose. Bound to lose. No good to nobody. No good for nothing. Because you are too old or too young or too fat or too slim too
Read on »Um, no, dear. Not really.
“It is because of me — I definitely think [my show] has helped the movement. Before it came out, everyone was still a little apprehensive about [same sex relationships]. Then they realized, ‘Wow, everyone is really into this stuff, and it is fine.’ The next thing you know, [gay marriage] is legal.” — Tila Tequila
Read on »Reading: Ruth 1:16-17
Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God: Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the LORD do so to
Read on »1st Corinthians 13:4-13
Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant. Love does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes
Read on »Selections from Leaves of Grass, Song of the Open Road
by Walt Whitman from verse 9 However sweet these laid-up stores–however convenient this dwelling, we cannot remain here; However shelter’d this port, and however calm these waters, we must not anchor here; However welcome the hospitality that surrounds us, we are permitted to receive it but a little while. … from verse 11 Listen! I
Read on »Best Acceptance Speech Ever
“A lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. Can you believe this shit? Hell has frozen over. Suck it, Jesus, this award is my god now.” — Kathy Griffin, accepting an Emmy award
Read on »quote of the day
“Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.” -William Morrisqu
Read on »My New Favorite Quote
“My favorite definition of a libertarian- and I can’t remember where I stole it from- is ‘a conservative who wants to sleep with liberal women.’” — From the comments on Pandagon’s article: “But Rush told me you had to tolerate my dick in your mouth” Funny because it’s true.
Read on »quote of the day
Do it. If it is not good enough, observe more and think. And then do it again. – SK Lam
Read on »My Past Falwell Greatest Hits
Joke posts about Falwell I posted in the past that are getting traffic now that he’s died. No guarantees on the quality of the jokes… The Theological Significance of Tinky Winky 5 Reasons Tinky Winky Can’t Be Gay The Top 13 Reasons Jerry Falwell Thinks Your Favorite TV Character is Gay The Batty Hymn of
Read on »Michele Bachmann
“Any of you who have members of your family that are in the lifestyle – we have a member of our family that is. This is not funny. It’s a very sad life. It’s part of Satan, I think, to say this is gay. It’s anything but gay.” – Michele Bachmann, (R) Minnesota 6th District.
Read on »Clerks II
“Well then, you must be as blind as Anne Frank, ’cause what’s the point in having an internet connection if you’re not using it to look at weird, fucked-up pictures of dirty sex you’ll never have yourself?” – Clerks II
Read on »The Bushes are “suffering”
On the Today Show this morning: ANN CURRY: Do you know the American people are suffering… watching [Iraq]? LAURA BUSH: Oh, I know that very much, and, believe me, no suffers more than their president and I do when we watch this. And certainly the commander-in-chief who has asked our military to go into harm’s
Read on »Good Disguises
Me to a co-worker: “But would you expect me to have a mustache and goatee? No – that’s why it’s a good disguise!” 2022-03-16 Update: Why did it take me so long to deal with my gender issues? I do not know.
Read on »Favorite Quotes
“Stop feeling sorry for yourself because someone said you’re going to die. I got an idea that’s gonna help us both. Now it is dangerous, and there’s a very good chance you will die. But if you don’t die, then we win. I don’t know about you, but things have really sucked for me lately,
Read on »Liberals
“Liberals got women the right to vote. Liberals got African-Americans the right to vote. Liberals created Social Security and lifted millions of elderly people out of poverty. Liberals ended segregation. Liberals passed the Civil Rights Act, the Voting Rights Act. Liberals created Medicare. Liberals passed the Clean Air Act, the Clean Water Act. What did
Read on »On the Bible
“Luckily, I happen to have a Bible laying around this house, because even though I’m not a Christian, I was an English major, and it is important to Know Your Ancient Mythologies if you are reading poetry.” — Amanda Marcotte, Pandagon.net thankyouverymuch.
Read on »Queer Quotes
Why can’t they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand guys with M16s going, “Who’d you call a faggot?” — Jon Stewart
Read on »Valentines Day Quotes
I require three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid. — Dorothy Parker
Read on »Nature cannot be fooled
Richard Feynman’s famous conclusion to his report on the shuttle Challenger accident, which arose again in the Columbia accident, is “For a successful technology, reality must take precedence over public relations, for Nature cannot be fooled.” [cribbed from Edward Tufte.] Yeah, no shit. Someone should point this out to Bush, tout de suite.
Read on »Favorite Quotes
Maureen Dowd on Dick Cheney: “In a democracy, when you run a campaign that panders to homophobia by attacking gay marriage and then your lesbian daughter writes a book about politics and decides to have a baby with her partner, you cannot tell Wolf Blitzer he’s “out of line” when he gingerly raises the hypocrisy
Read on »More Gatsby
“Self-control!” Repeated Tom incredulously. “I suppose the latest thing is to sit back and let Mr. Nobody from Nowhere make love to your wife. Well, if that’s the idea you can count me out. . . . Nowadays people begin by sneering at family life and family institutions, and next they’ll throw everything overboard and
Read on »Gatsby Quotes
He smiled understandingly—much more than understandingly. It was one of those rare smiles with a quality of eternal reassurance in it, that you may come across four or five times in life. It faced—or seemed to face—the whole external world for an instant, and then concentrated on you with an irresistible prejudice in your favor.
Read on »Best Post-Degrassi quote of the day
“You put your underwear on inside out and you’re calling me a dork?”
Read on »Quote
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow
Read on »“I’m not a bigot”
Via the Consumerist, this incredibly funny quote: Now, I am NOT trying to bash homosexuals and I am not a bigot; however, I feel homosexuality is morally wrong and should not be “promoted” as what is the norm for society. Shorter: “I am not a basher or a bigot, however, I am a basher and
Read on »Staceyann Chin’s speech/poem at Gay Games VII
A selection from Stacyann Chin’s speech at the Opening Ceremonies of the Gay Games (this was the part I love so much): I don’t know why but the term lesbian just seems so confrontational to me why can’t you people just say you date other people? Again I say nothing tongue and courage tied with
Read on »Quotes
“We have now sunk to a depth at which restatement of the obvious is the first duty of intelligent men.” — George Orwell
Read on »Equality
“Equality is not a concept. It’s not something we should be striving for. It’s a necessity. Equality’s like gravity. We need it to stand on this earth as men and women. The misogyny that is in every culture is not a true part of the human condition. It is life out of balance, and that
Read on »Imagine a World
B Tal captured this photo at the New England Holocaust Memorial. Imagine a World “Ilse, a childhood friend of mine, once found a raspberry in the camp and carried it in her pocket all day to present to me that night on a leaf. Imagine a world in which your entire possession is one raspberry
Read on »Two Unrelated Quotes
“The steam that blew the whistle never turned the wheel.” — “Believe me, I sympathize with you; it just comes out as laughter.” — my co-worker Beth.
Read on »Quotes
“… because we watched a debate from the House of Representatives about the Iraq Resolution, and it did seem like – you ever been to Trafalgar Square, where they have the, uh, speaker’s corner where, like, crazy people get up on a box, and go, “Harrumph! And Roosevelt stole my couch!” You know, that kind
Read on »Quote
“Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.” –Sam Brown
Read on »Party Arrival Times
My favorite quote from the comments on this discussion about what is the optimal time to arrive at a party: This only works if all guests judge by the same criteria. They do not. In many circles, late arrivers are seen as lazy, irreponsible, disorganized, rude, or to posers or strivers who try to cram
Read on »A Priceless Quote
Regarding the same-sex marriage ban: “I don’t believe there’s any issue that’s more important than this one,” said Sen. David Vitter, a Louisiana Republican. Note where the guy is from — a state who’s citizens are still displaced all over the country, who had a major U.S. city destroyed last year.
Read on »blaming mathematics for your inability to add
From the crushworthy site NonSequitur: So while many liberals may perhaps share the satisfaction of having been right about Iraq and Afghanistan from the very beginning, this does not mean (1) that they are gleeful over the damage that has been done to America, and more perniciously, (2) that they brought it about or desired
Read on »The Bible is Fiction
Ian McKellen, cast in the movie The DaVinci Code, had some choice words about the bible in recent interview: Matt Lauer: “There have been calls from some religious groups, they wanted a disclaimer at the beginning of this movie saying it is fiction because one of the themes in the book really knocks Christianity right
Read on »idiots rule
“Everything you love, everything meaningful with depth and history, all passionate authentic experiences will be appropriated, mishandled, watered down, cheapened, repackaged, marketed and sold to the people you hate.” — Mr. Jalopy.
Read on »Alabama needs better sex ed classes. Seriously.
The website goodasyou.com pointed out an anti-gay “sex-ed” (no actual education included) pamphlet distributed by an Alabama Middle School that has a quote that literally made me snort soda out of my nose a few minutes ago. These same sex “unions” cannot provide an adequate means of achieving a genuine physical relationship with another human
Read on »Favorite Quotes
“Cocaine is a drug whose principle effect is to make assholes feel good about themselves.” — from Kent, in the comments on Ian’s blog.
Read on »Fame
The time of getting fame for your name on its own is over. Artwork that is only about wanting to be famous will never make you famous. Any fame is a by-product of making something that means something. You don’t go to a restaurant and order a meal because you want to have a shit.
Read on »Really?
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. — Albert Einstein I’ll have to double-check on that one, because it sounds like one of those quotes that we hope is true, but later find out isn’t.
Read on »Buffy Quotes
A big fat list I had stashed somewhere on my hard drive, that I just recently unearthed. Heh. It’s not comprehensive; it’s missing the last few years of the show. “Anchovies, anchovies you’re so delicious. I love you more than all the other fishes.” -Dawn Summers Buffy: Fire Bad. Tree Pretty. Buffy: “Can you vague
Read on »List of Signature Phrases
Wikipedia has a great list of signature phrases — the unique lines associated with real or fictional characters, and they cover a lot of territory. Read it over; it will bring back some memories. # “Aciao good night!” (Aciao bonsoir!) – P.P.D. the puppet in the French satiric show Les Guignols de l’Info, at the
Read on »President Washington Used Electronic Wiretaps
“President Washington, President Lincoln, President Wilson, President Roosevelt have all authorized electronic surveillance on a far broader scale.” — Attorney General Alberto Gonzales while testifying before congress on illegal wiretapping No, I’m not shitting you, he really said that, and you can see the video yourself. Can I also point out that aside from the
Read on »Corett Scott King Quotes
“I still hear people say that I should not be talking about the rights of lesbian and gay people and I should stick to the issue of racial justice,” she said. “But I hasten to remind them that Martin Luther King Jr. said, ‘Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.’ I appeal to everyone
Read on »I’m just saying
Quiero lamer te hasta que te vengas en mi boca mil veces. — From the L-Word (of course).
Read on »What have you given us, Dr. Franklin?
It’s Benjamin Franklin’s 300th birthday. The story goes that, as Franklin left the Constitutional Convention in 1787, he was approached by a Mrs. Powell, who asked him, “What have you given us, Dr. Franklin?” “A republic,” he replied, “if you can keep it.” With Alito, looks like that’s pretty much gone, now.
Read on »If you can’t maim them, Auntie Mame them
Mame Dennis: Well, now, uh, read me all the words you don’t understand. Patrick Dennis: Libido, inferiority complex, stinko, blotto, free love, bathtub gin, monkey glands, Karl Marx… is he one of the Marx Brothers? Patrick Dennis: …Neurotic, heterosexual… Mame Dennis: Oh, my my my my, what an eager little mind. [takes the list] Mame
Read on »Thomas Jefferson
“Bear in mind this sacred principle, that though the will of the majority is in all cases to prevail, that will, to be rightful, must be reasonable; that the minority possess their equal rights, which equal laws must protect, and to violate would be oppression.” –Thomas Jefferson: 1st Inaugural, 1801. ME 3:318
Read on »Quote of the week: “I got saved at an Amway Meeting”
Found in middle of Salon Magazine’s article “Verily, I sell unto you” — on the new trend of Christian business owners advertising their faith as a part of their business. I knew there was a great reason not to go to Amway meetings.
Read on »New Favorite Quote
Again from the Television Without Pity recap of Carnivale, this time from the season finale: “Libby crosses the carnival to find Sofie hanging out by a tent, and they both kick off their date by lighting cigarettes. Flick…ahh. Then they stare deep into each other’s eyes and kiss. I think it’s kind of sad that
Read on »Alanis: Irony Defined.
Irony defined — by the British, of course, because they did invent the language after all. I’m posting this here because I’m resisting the temptation to send it directly to people. Favorite part so far: “every one of us, I’d guess, has a friend who engages in an argument, waits patiently until you’ve said something
Read on »Good vs. Evil
“And of course, he chose evil. I guess you can’t blame him, that’s where all the money and glamour is. The good side just has a bunch of broke, ignored, frustrated do-gooders. Evil has the top shelf gin and those nice thick ice cubes that keep the drink cold for as long as it takes.
Read on »Glass Dog
I assume you’re looking for some hot little thing in a Catholic schoolgirl uniform-type with the freckles and the button nose and the big tits, like? Some sort of virgin-whore who’s wild in the sack and talks dirty only when she’s whispering in your ear? Uhhhhhh, she’s right over there. Pass her a note, purse
Read on »Favorite quote of the week
“I haven’t been up that early since Princess Diana’s wedding.” — Carrie Bradshaw, Sex in the City.
Read on »Indigo Girls
New favorite lyric: “You are so baroque; all of those words, just to tell me no.” — from”Yield”, Become You, the Indigo Girls
Read on »Rosie Comes Out
“They’re saying I’m not gay enough. They say I lied because I said I love Tom Cruise. I do love Tom Cruise. What do I have to do, have sex with Angelina Jolie on TV?” — Rosie O’Donnell, lashing out at people who quibble with her coming-out technique at a benefit for ovarian cancer in
Read on »Words To Live By
Discontent is the penalty we pay for being ungrateful for what we have.
Read on »Control of the world cannot be handed over to evil men
In the battle between against evil, when all peaceful options are exhausted, men of good conscience must get up and fight. Control of the world cannot be handed over to evil men by good people too weak-willed to stand up against them. — Krishna, The Bhagavad Gita
Read on »cool quote
Garrison Kellior: Frankness is good for friendship: It weeds out puny friendships and strengthens the healthy ones.
Read on »Garrison Kellior: A true friend
Garrison Kellior: A true friend is someone you could call up and say, “I’m a wreck and I’m coming over and staying with you for a couple days.” Or you could say, “I’m sorry to call you at 3 a.m. but I’m sitting in a truck stop confused and missing my pants and need you
Read on »honesty is the best policy
I like the phrase “honesty is the best policy.” It sort of implies that you’ve tried other policies, and realized they didn’t work. It’s not one of those “because I said so” kind of instructions. It’s like the voice of experience talking. Sort of : “I’ve been a big liar, but it really wasn’t all
Read on »where else would I meet you?
Thought I was smart enough not to say out loud to someone who suggested I go to hell: I must already be there; where else would I meet you?”
Read on »stealing from our fellow beings
Any time we accumulate more than we actually need, we are actually stealing from our fellow beings,” explains Feuerstein. This reminds me of much of the criticism I’ve received lately….
Read on »Things I said…
I don’t need clones. You have to feed them. What I need is a doppelganger. You can’t straddle the fence without bruising your genitalia. On George W. Bush: I don’t want a president who’s done more drugs than me. On President G. W. Bush: At the very least, I can say I’m smarter than the
Read on »The Wisdom Of Supermodels
Note: Most of these quotes have been debunked on Snopes.com as untrue. ON COURAGE: "They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, ‘Oh my God, I have to be so brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.’" -Cindy Crawford ON POVERTY: "Everyone should have enough money to
Read on »One-Liners From Your Favorite Comics
A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket. ‘You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?’ she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, ‘I didn’t know there were any witnesses. Now I’ll have to kill you too. – Jake Johansen A study in the Washington Post
Read on »Funny Quotes
You coveteth my ice cream bar, but you cannot have it. I have had this ice cream bar since I was a child.
— Ren, from Ren and Stimpy
Yes, They Really Said That…
Unbelievable quotes of the rich and famous.
Read on »Quayle Quotes
Recently, Dan Quayle announced his intentions to run for President of the U.S. in 2000. Since many younger voters may not have been watching the news when these were said the first time, we provide you with this list of famous Quayle quotes.
Read on »Inspirational Quotes
g’nothi s’auton – Know thy self — inscription on the wall of the temple at Delphi You don’t drown by falling in water. You drown by staying there. — Robert Allen If at first you don’t succeed, you are running about average. — M. H. Anderson Live, live, live! Life is a banquet, and most
Read on »On the Subject of Love
There is a Law that man should love his neighbor as himself. In a few years it should be as natural to mankind as breathing or the upright gait; but if he does not learn it he must perish.
— Alfred Adler
Jane Austen
My favorite quotes from her correspondence.
Read on »Ode To The Malty Brew
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. –Dave Barry Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no
Read on »