True Love

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  • Post category:Inspiration

by S. I. Kishor

This story originally published in a 1943 issue of Collier’s magazine. More on the story here at Snopes.com

John Blanchard stood up from the bench, straightened his Army uniform, and studied the crowd of people making their way through Grand Central Station.

He looked for the girl whose heart he knew, but whose face he didn’t, the girl with the rose.

His interest in her had begun thirteen months before in a Florida library. Taking a book off the shelf he found himself intrigued, not with the words of the book, but with the notes penciled in the margin.

The soft handwriting reflected a thoughtful soul and insightful mind. In the front of the book, he discovered the previous owner’s name Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he located her address.

She now lived in New York City. He wrote her a letter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond. The next day he was shipped overseas for service in World War II.

During the next year and one month the two grew to know each other through the mail. Each letter was a seed falling on a fertile heart. A romance was budding. Blanchard requested a photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wouldn’t matter what she looked like.

When the day finally came for him to return from Europe, they scheduled their first meeting – 7:00 PM at the Grand Central Station in New York City.

"You’ll recognize me," she wrote, "by the red rose I’ll be wearing on my lapel."

So at 7:00 he was in the station looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he’d never seen.

I’ll let Mr. Blanchard tell you what happened:

"A young woman was coming toward me, her figure long and slim. Her blonde hair lay back in curls from her delicate ears; her eyes were blue as flowers. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime come alive."

"I started toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not wearing a rose. As I moved, a small, provocative smile curved her lips, ‘Going my way, sailor’ she murmured."

"Almost uncontrollably I made one step closer to her, and then I saw Hollis Maynell."

"She was standing almost directly behind the girl. A woman well past 40, she had graying hair tucked under a worn hat. She was more than plump, her thick-ankled feet thrust into low-heeled shoes."

The girl in the green suit was walking quickly away. I felt as though I was split in two, so keen was my desire to follow her, and yet so deep was my longing for the woman whose spirit had truly companioned me and upheld my own."

"And there she stood. Her pale, plump face was gentle and sensible, her gray eyes had a warm and kindly twinkle. I did not hesitate. My fingers gripped the small worn blue leather copy of the book that was to identify me to her.

"This would not be love, but it would be something precious, something perhaps even better than love, a friendship for which I had been and must ever be grateful.

"I squared my shoulders and saluted and held out the book to the woman, even though while I spoke I felt choked by the bitterness of my disappointment.

"I’m Lieutenant John Blanchard, and you must be Miss Maynell. I am so glad you could meet me; may I take you to dinner?"

The woman’s face broadened into a tolerant smile.

"I don’t know what this is about, son," she answered, "but the young lady in the green suit who just went by, she begged me to wear this rose on my coat. And she said if you were to ask me out to dinner, I should go and tell you that she is waiting for you in the big restaurant across the street. She said it was some kind of test!"

It’s not difficult to understand and admire Miss Maynell’s wisdom. The true nature of a heart is seen in its response to the unattractive. "Tell me whom you love," Houssaye wrote, "And I will tell you who you are."

Continue ReadingTrue Love

My Chinese horoscope

Figuring out my Chinese horoscope.

Birthday/time: June 6th, 1968, 7:01 a.m.

Latitude and Longitude where I was born: West Des Moines, IA (US): 41n35, 93w43, Iowa.

Timezone: -6 GMT.

You are Red Sheep, born in the year of Brown Monkey. The first character in DAY represents you. So you are equivalent to Fire.

Lucky element: Water.

Luckiest decades – age 40-50, age 50-60, age 60-70

My Chinese Horoscope

Continue ReadingMy Chinese horoscope

Computer Hillbilly

  • Post author:
  • Post category:Jokes

Author Unknown

(to the tune of ‘The Beverly Hillbillies’)

Come and listen to a story ’bout a man named Jed,
A poor college kid, barely kept his family fed,
But then one day he was talking to a recruiter,
Who said, "they pay big bucks if ya work on a computer…"

Windows, that is … PCs.. workstations..

Well, the first thing ya know ol’ Jed’s an Engineer.
The kinfolk said "Jed, move away from here".
They said "California is the place ya oughta be",
So he bought some donuts and he moved to Silicon Valley…

Intel, that is… Pentium.. big amusement park…

On his first day at work, they stuck him in a cube.
Fed him more donuts and sat him at a tube.
They said "your project’s late, but we know just what to do.
Instead of 40 hours, we’ll work you 52!"

OT, that is… unpaid… mandatory…

The weeks rolled by and things were looking bad.
Schedules started slipping and some managers were mad.
They called another meeting and decided on a fix.
The answer was simple… "We’ll work him sixty-six!"

Tired, that is… stressed out… no social life.

Months turned to years and his hair was turning grey.
Jed worked very hard while his life slipped away.
Waiting to retire when he turned 64,
Instead he got a call and escorted out the door.

Laid off, that is… de-briefed… unemployed…

Now the moral of the story is listen to what you’re told,
Companies will use you and discard you when you’re old.
So gather up your friends and start your own firm,
Beat the competition, watch the bosses squirm.

Millionaires, that is… Bill Gates… Steve Jobs…

Y’all come back now…ya hear!

Continue ReadingComputer Hillbilly

What If People Bought Cars Like They Buy Computers?

Author Unknown

General Motors doesn’t have a "help line" for people who don’t know how to drive, because people don’t buy cars like they buy computers – but imagine if they did?


HELPLINE: "General Motors Helpline, how can I help you?"

CUSTOMER: "I got in my car and closed the door, and nothing happened!"

HELPLINE: "Did you put the key in the ignition and turn it?"

CUSTOMER: "What’s an ignition?"

HELPLINE: "It’s a starter motor that draws current from your battery and turns over the engine."

CUSTOMER: "Ignition? Motor? Battery? Engine? How come I have to know all of these technical terms just to use my car?"


HELPLINE: "General Motors Helpline, how can I help you?"

CUSTOMER: "My car ran fine for a week, and now it won’t go anywhere!"

HELPLINE: "Is the gas tank empty?"

CUSTOMER: "Huh? How do I know?"

HELPLINE: "There’s a little gauge on the front panel, with a needle, and markings from ‘E’ to ‘F’. Where is the needle pointing?"

CUSTOMER: "I see an ‘E’ but no ‘F’."

HELPLINE: "You see the ‘E’ and just to the right is the ‘F’.

CUSTOMER: "No, just to the right of the first ‘E’ is a ‘V’.

HELPLINE: "A ‘V’?!?"

CUSTOMER: "Yeah, there’s a ‘C’, an ‘H’, the first ‘E’, then a ‘V’, followed by ‘R’, ‘O’, ‘L’ …"

HELPLINE: "No, no, no sir! That’s the front of the car. When you sit behind the steering wheel, that’s the panel I’m talking about."

CUSTOMER: "That steering wheel thingy– Is that the round thing that honks the horn?"

HELPLINE: "Yes, among other things."

CUSTOMER: "The needle’s pointing to ‘E’. What does that mean?"

HELPLINE: "It means that you have to visit a gasoline vendor and purchase some more gasoline. You can install it yourself, or pay the vendor to install it for you."

CUSTOMER: "What? I paid $12,000 for this car! Now you tell me that I have to keep buying more components? I want a car that comes with everything built in!"


HELPLINE: "General Motors Helpline, how can I help you?"

CUSTOMER: "Your cars suck!"

HELPLINE: "What’s wrong?"

CUSTOMER: "It crashed, that’s what went wrong!"

HELPLINE: "What were you doing?"

CUSTOMER: "I wanted to go faster, so I pushed the accelerator pedal all the way to the floor. It worked for a while, and then it crashed — and now it won’t even start up!"

HELPLINE: "I’m sorry, sir, but it’s your responsibility if you misuse the product."

CUSTOMER: "Misuse it? I was just following this damned manual of yours. It said to make the car go to put the transmission in ‘D’ and press the accelerator pedal. That’s exactly what I did –now the damn thing’s crashed."

HELPLINE: "Did you read the entire operator’s manual before operating the car sir?"

CUSTOMER: "What? Of course I did! I told you I did EVERYTHING the manual said and it didn’t work!"

HELPLINE: "Didn’t you attempt to slow down so you wouldn’t crash?"

CUSTOMER: "Huh! How do you do THAT?"

HELPLINE: "You said you read the entire manual, sir. It’s on page 14. The pedal next to the accelerator."

CUSTOMER: "Well, I don’t have all day to sit around and read this manual you know."

HELPLINE: "Of course not. What do you expect us to do about it?"

CUSTOMER: "I want you to send me one of the latest versions that goes fast and won’t crash anymore!"


HELPLINE: "General Motors Helpline, how can I help you?"

CUSTOMER: "Hi! I just bought my first car, and I chose your car because it has automatic transmission,cruise control, power steering, power brakes, and power door locks."

HELPLINE: "Thanks for buying our car. How can I help you?"

CUSTOMER: "How do I work it?"

HELPLINE: "Do you know how to drive?"

CUSTOMER: "Do I know how to what?"

HELPLINE: "Do you know how to DRIVE?"

CUSTOMER: "I’m not a technical person! I just want to go places in my car!"

Continue ReadingWhat If People Bought Cars Like They Buy Computers?

Computer One-Liners

Author Unknown

Home is where you hang your @

The E-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.

A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.

You can’t teach a new mouse old clicks.

Great groups from little icons grow.

Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.

C: is the root of all directories.

Don’t put all your hypes in one home page.

Pentium wise; pen and paper foolish.

The modem is the message.

Too many clicks spoil the browse.

The geek shall inherit the earth.

A chat has nine lives.

Don’t byte off more than you can view.

FAX is stranger than fiction.

What boots up must come down.

Windows will never cease.

In Gates we trust.

Virtual reality is its own reward.

Modulation in all things.

A user and his leisure time are soon parted.

There’s no place like <http://www.home.com/>

Know what to expect before you connect.

Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice.

Speed thrills.

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him to use the Net and he won’t
bother you for weeks.

Continue ReadingComputer One-Liners

Utilities turned on

On Saturday, the phone guy and the cable guy redid the lines to my new house. The cable’s working fine, but the phone still needs to be worked on–apparently at the central office. But I cleaned out the shed at the back of the house, and got some of the linoleum off the living room floor, and vacuumed and dusted the upstairs. I weeded some in the front of the house. Moved the TV and some small furniture, and a box of glassware. Sunday, I painted another coat on the dining room floor and moved some more stuff. Packed my CDs and liquor. Saw The Count of Monte Cristo on television, and decided that I’d paint a pattern on the floors. Don’t know what yet; I’ll do it after I move.

Continue ReadingUtilities turned on

11 Reasons Why Prison Is Better Than Work

Author Unknown

  1. In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8′ X 10′ cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6′ X 8′ cubicle.
  2. In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.
  3. In prison you get time off for good behavior. At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
  4. In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
  5. In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
  6. In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere. At work you are just ball-and-chained.
  7. In prison you get your own toilet. At work you have to share.
  8. In prison they allow your family and friends to visit. At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.
  9. In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required. At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.
  10. In prison you can join many programs which you can leave at any time. At work there are some programs you can never get out of.
  11. In prison there are wardens who are often sadistic. At work we have managers.
Continue Reading11 Reasons Why Prison Is Better Than Work

Top Ten Signs You Have Joined A Cheap HMO

Author Unknown

10. Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters.

9. Directions to your doctor’s office include, "take a left when you enter the trailer park."

8. Tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicle.

7. Only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

6. Only item listed under Preventive Care feature of coverage is "an apple a day".

5. Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.

4. "Patient responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo.

3. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.

2. With your last HMO, your birth control pills didn’t come in different colors with little "M"’s on them.

and Number 1 Sign You’ve Joined a Cheap HMO

1. You ask for Viagra. You get a popsicle stick and duct tape.

Continue ReadingTop Ten Signs You Have Joined A Cheap HMO

Dictionary of Evaluation Comments

Author Unknown

Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee work performance evaluations s/he keeps cranking out.

Active Socially:
Drinks heavily.

Alert To Company Developments:
An office gossip.

Approaches Difficult Problems With Logic:
Finds someone else to do the job.

Average:
Not too bright.

Character Above Reproach:
Still one step ahead of the law.

Competent:
Is still able to get work done if supervisor helps.

Conscientious And Careful:
Scared.

Consults With Supervisor Often:
Pain in the ass.

Demonstrates Qualities Of Leadership:
Has a loud voice.

Deserves Promotion:
Create new title to make him/her feel appreciated.

Enjoys Job:
Needs more to do.

Exceptionally Well Qualified:
Has committed no major blunders to date.

Expresses Self Well:
Can string two sentences together.

Gets Along Extremely Well With Superiors And Subordinates Alike:
A coward.

Happy:
Paid too much.

Hard Worker:
Usually does it the hard way.

Indifferent To Instruction:
Knows more than superiors.

Is Unusually Loyal:
Wanted by no-one else.

Judgement Is Usually Sound:
Lucky.

A Keen Analyst:
Thoroughly confused.

Keen Sense Of Humor:
Knows lots of dirty jokes.

Maintains Professional Attitude:
A snob.

Meticulous In Attention To Detail:
A nitpicker.

Not A Desk Person:
Did not go to college.

Of Great Value To The Organization:
Turns in work on time.

Quick Thinking:
Offers plausible excuses for errors.

Requires Work-Value Attitudinal Readjustment:
Lazy and hard-headed.

Should Go Far:
Please.

Slightly Below Average:
Stupid.

Spends Extra Hours On The Job:
Miserable home life.

Stern Disciplinarian:
A real jerk.

Strong Adherence To Principles:
Stubborn.

Tactful In Dealing With Superiors:
Knows when to keep mouth shut.

Takes Pride In Work:
Conceited.

Takes Advantage Of Every Opportunity To Progress:
Buys drinks for superiors.

Unlimited Potential:
Will stick with us until retirement.

Uses Resources Well:
Delegates everything.

Uses Time Effectively:
Clock watcher.

Very Creative:
Finds 22 reasons to do anything except original work.

Well Organized:
Does too much busywork.

Will Go Far:
Relative of management.

Zealous Attitude:
Opinionated.

Continue ReadingDictionary of Evaluation Comments