Author Unknown
Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee work performance evaluations s/he keeps cranking out.
Active Socially:
Drinks heavily.
Alert To Company Developments:
An office gossip.
Approaches Difficult Problems With Logic:
Finds someone else to do the job.
Average:
Not too bright.
Character Above Reproach:
Still one step ahead of the law.
Competent:
Is still able to get work done if supervisor helps.
Conscientious And Careful:
Scared.
Consults With Supervisor Often:
Pain in the ass.
Demonstrates Qualities Of Leadership:
Has a loud voice.
Deserves Promotion:
Create new title to make him/her feel appreciated.
Enjoys Job:
Needs more to do.
Exceptionally Well Qualified:
Has committed no major blunders to date.
Expresses Self Well:
Can string two sentences together.
Gets Along Extremely Well With Superiors And Subordinates Alike:
A coward.
Happy:
Paid too much.
Hard Worker:
Usually does it the hard way.
Indifferent To Instruction:
Knows more than superiors.
Is Unusually Loyal:
Wanted by no-one else.
Judgement Is Usually Sound:
Lucky.
A Keen Analyst:
Thoroughly confused.
Keen Sense Of Humor:
Knows lots of dirty jokes.
Maintains Professional Attitude:
A snob.
Meticulous In Attention To Detail:
A nitpicker.
Not A Desk Person:
Did not go to college.
Of Great Value To The Organization:
Turns in work on time.
Quick Thinking:
Offers plausible excuses for errors.
Requires Work-Value Attitudinal Readjustment:
Lazy and hard-headed.
Should Go Far:
Please.
Slightly Below Average:
Stupid.
Spends Extra Hours On The Job:
Miserable home life.
Stern Disciplinarian:
A real jerk.
Strong Adherence To Principles:
Stubborn.
Tactful In Dealing With Superiors:
Knows when to keep mouth shut.
Takes Pride In Work:
Conceited.
Takes Advantage Of Every Opportunity To Progress:
Buys drinks for superiors.
Unlimited Potential:
Will stick with us until retirement.
Uses Resources Well:
Delegates everything.
Uses Time Effectively:
Clock watcher.
Very Creative:
Finds 22 reasons to do anything except original work.
Well Organized:
Does too much busywork.
Will Go Far:
Relative of management.
Zealous Attitude:
Opinionated.
