Jesus Is Watching You

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables. When he picked up a CD player to stuff into his sack, he heard a strange disembodied voice come through the darkness: "Jesus is watching you."

He nearly jumped out of his skin! He shut off his flashlight and waited… When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head and resumed searching for more valuables. Just as he disconnected the stereo, he heard again, clear as a bell:

"Jesus is watching you."

Completely freaked, he shone his light around looking for the source of the voice. In a corner of the room the beam came to rest upon an African parrot.

"Did you say that?!" he hissed at the parrot.

"Yep," the bird replied. "I’m just trying to warn you."

The burglar visibly relaxed. "Warn me, huh?! Who the heck are you?"

"Moses," replied the parrot.

The burglar laughed, "What kind of stupid people would name a parrot Moses?"

"Probably," the bird answered, "the same kind of people who would name a rottweiler Jesus."

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