I don’t need clones. You have to feed them. What I need is a doppelganger.
You can’t straddle the fence without bruising your genitalia.
On George W. Bush: I don’t want a president who’s done more drugs than me.
On President G. W. Bush: At the very least, I can say I’m smarter than the President of the United States.
My favorite Guin Turner movie? Taxicab Confessions. I like her acting best when she’s drunk and unaware of the camera.