same-sex marriage

Marriage, children and equal rights

Good As You presents an especially apt point about the fallaciousness of the “reserving marriage for the nuturing of children” argument:

Hmm..you know why the judges “ignored is that marriage is not primarily about adults; marriage is about the nurturing and development of children?” Because marriage certificates don’t legalize unions with the caveat that those unions produce children! Marriage is one thing; reproduction is another!

Saying that this legal, civil arrangement is all about a non-required by-product of the coupling is kind of like saying that one’s obtaining of a driver’s license is all about the the car, not the legal right. In reality, the person may just want to be recognized as a legal driver, and they might want the license solely for ID purposes. In fact, this New Yorker has a legal license AND a car, but he hasn’t driven in four years. Doesn’t make my license any less legal! And while it may sound insensitive or callous to compare a car to a human child, the comparison in this instance is quite apt. You can’t deny one the ability to obtain any sort of civil permit or license simply because they don’t utilize the legality in the way that you see proper!

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Mark Foley, and “real” gay relationships

In an opinion piece for the LA Times, Michelangelo Signorile says that the media should have “outed” Mark Foley as gay soon after his hypocritcal votes in favor of anti-gay legislation. I agree with Signorile about “outing” hypocritical public figures, and always have. But there’s something else in the article that I wanted to highlight…

Foley lived in a glass closet in Washington, where many people, we’re now being told, assumed he was gay, even as he orchestrated a lie for the voters of his district with help from the media both in Washington and at home in Florida.
Foley’s closet wasn’t just about protecting his political career. He seemed to be filled with shame. According to one gay man quoted in the Washington Post last week who challenged Foley on his voting for the Defense of Marriage Act in 1996, Foley justified marginalizing gay marriage by saying, “I could never compare any relationship I have ever had to the nature of my mother and father’s relationship.”
For Foley, homosexuality meant second-class status.
That kind of self-loathing is bound to play out in harmful ways. Would Foley have made online sexual advances on teenagers if he were openly gay or if he’d been reported on, truthfully, by the media as a gay man long ago, and faced the consequences? It’s quite possible the answer is no.

I find the phrase I highlighted above just heartbreaking, for Mark Foley’s sake as well as for my own.
I love my parents, and the people who are especially my role models for a good marriage — my paternal grandparents, who are just wonderful people. But do they somehow have a more “valid” relationship than mine? Of course not. When I see my girlfriend, I see someone as important to me as the members of my own family; someone that I love, adore, want to become a better person for, to live with and build a life with.
If I can live up to my grandparent’s example even half way (I’ve referred to them in the past as living examples of “happily ever after”) then I will be more successful as a spouse than 95% of heterosexual married couples are. And I love Stephanie so much that I want that for her and for me. I want a relationship like my grandparents have, with love and stability, surrounded by family and friends.
As loathsome as I think Mark Foley’s behavior was, I hope that someday he finds a relationship that moves him in that way, too — an equitable relationship based on respect and honesty and concern for the well being of his partner, and not taking advantage of people over whom he has power.

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Oh my god, Did Bauer just throw us under the bus?

Thanks to Bil for pointing out this jaw-dropping statement from Indiana Minority Leader Pat Bauer, D-South Bend:

“I just think that the only way for (Republicans) not to (continue to) demagogue it is to have a redundancy. It’s too bad it has to go in the constitution, but so be it,” Bauer said. “It’s not worth the time, the trouble, to point out that it’s not a problem (in Indiana), so it’s better just to have the vote and see how it goes.”

Under GOP leadership, both chambers of the General Assembly passed a same-sex marriage amendment last year. The measure must be approved by the newly elected Legislature next year or in 2008 before it could go on the statewide ballot for approval from voters.

That’s nice. Tell me again why I live in Indiana?

Continue ReadingOh my god, Did Bauer just throw us under the bus?

Brad Pitt: I’ll marry when everyone can

via Shakesville, this article on Yahoo:

“Angie and I will consider tying the knot when everyone else in the country who wants to be married is legally able,” the 42-year-old actor reveals in Esquire magazine’s October issue, on newsstands Sept. 19.

That is pretty awesome. I have to admit that at each of the three weddings we’ve been to in the past year, although I was deeply supportive of the happy couple, there was a part of me that resented their ability to get married.

It’s also pretty awesome that Zack, contributor to Shakesville, is proposing a “band together in solidarity” pledge for straight couples to not get married until we can. That is not only helpful, but necessary if we ever hope to make change.

But the most awesome thing of all is what some of the people said in the comments to Zack’s post — how their 80-year old parents got divorced with the help of lawyers for family charges in protest that their gay kids can’t get married. Man alive! That’s cool as hell.  You can contact attorneys help for your family law claims to help you out in this situation. As divorce has negative impacts on child growth,they have suggested that you can consult child custody lawyers serving Richland to help you legally. Hire a Schaumburg divorce lawyer to handle the legal aspects of your divorce while you sort out personal issues.

Continue ReadingBrad Pitt: I’ll marry when everyone can

Freedom From Religion

From Good As You:

I mean just the other day this was chatting with this Jewish friend of mine who keeps kosher, and he was all like, ” Ya know, my religious beliefs tell me that consuming pork is not in my best interest, so I think I’m gonna take that belief to the public, church/state separated realm of governance and try and get pork banned for all.” You can check here to know more about the merit of prayer and the support it provides. After grabbing a hot dog, I then trekked down to visit my Muslin chum, who told me about this new “one woman, one head cover” bill he’s hoping to have enforced on people of all faiths. After briefly imagining the career death of virtually every female celebrity under 30, I continued to my Scientologist pal’s mansion, where he told me to stop being “glib” and start helping him ban psychiatric medicine and drugs in this country. Weirded out, I finally swung by my Atheist friend’s home, where she eagerly told me about her “One nation under self-replicating molecules” changes she was proposing for this nation’s pledge of allegiance.
It was only after visiting all of these folks that I finally realized, “Hey, why let the facts that there are many different beliefs and that we, as Americans, have the right to subscribe to any or none of them stop each of us from pushing our own versions of moral fitness onto the public at large?” My world view has been changed at the hand of extremist religious conviction!

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Prize for killing gay people

Via Good As You:

Just a month before the 2006 WorldPride Parade is scheduled to be held in Jerusalem (Aug. 6-12), protest flyers are reportedly being distributed to residents of the capital city offering a cash reward to “anyone who brings about the death of one of the residents of Sodom and Gomorrah.”

I haven’t always been a fan of our local pride celebrations, and I need to stop taking them for granted.

The anonymous letter also suggests using Molotov cocktails against marchers and adds instructions as to how to make them at home. The explosives are nicknamed “Shliesel Special”, in honor of the Haredi protester who disrupted the Jerusalem Pride Parade last year by stabbing three marchers.

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AFA Sues Michigan State To Block Same-Sex Benefits

Advance Indiana comments on a recently announce lawsuit from the American Family Association — suing to block same-sex couples from receiving university health care benefits on the basis of Michigan’s ban on same-sex marriages.
I’m blogging this specifically for my mom and other family members — THIS IS THE REASON THESE BANS ARE SO DANGEROUS. Because they aren’t just after preventing same-sex marriages. They’re after outlawing ANY legal relationships between gay people, including health-care benefits.
And the law that Indiana is trying to pass (SJR7) is even more broad than Michigan’s: “Constitution or any other Indiana law may not be construed to require that marital status or the legal incidents of marriage be conferred upon unmarried couples or groups.”
Which means that regardless of a legal marriage, a whole host of legal rights that Stephanie and I have today because we own property together could suddenly be considered invalid, including some of our property rights if one of us dies.
Please recognize how dangerous this is, and help me fight this law. The best way that you can do this is by not putting the same bigotted Republican officials back in the state legislature. They have to vote on this law a second time (it’s already passed once) for it to be put on a state ballot.

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More Indiana State Legislature Attacks on Gay People

Bills that affect lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered folks in Indiana:

Preference of Marriage Bills
House Bill 1335 (Preference for marriage over other relationships) and House Bill 1202 (Preference for marriage; instruction by schools) – Introduced by Rep. Jeff Thompson (R-Lizton) These two bills, would have Indiana law declare that marriage is preferred, encouraged, and supported over any other domestic relationship. Additionally, it would require that public schools not allow instruction that is contrary to policies established by law concerning marriage. HB 1335 has been assigned to the House Public Policy and Veterans Affairs Committee; HB 1202 has been sent to the House Education Committee. Neither bill is yet scheduled for committee consideration. This legislation appears to be in response to the idea among some social conservatives that schools are “promoting homosexuality.”

Patricia Miller’s Resurrection of “Unauthorized Reproduction” Bill
Senate Bill 0273 (Abandoned embryos and adoption matters) – Introduced by Sen. Patricia Miller (R-Indianapolis) Among other things this legislation calls for the Health Finance Commission to study assisted reproduction, infertility, gestational agreements, and surrogacy arrangements. SB 0273 has been assigned to the Senate Judiciary Committee; however, no hearing date has been set. The proposed study appears to be an attempt by Sen. Miller to resurrect her unsuccessful proposal to make assisted reproduction illegal for same-sex couples, unmarried couples, and single women.

What to do about it
WHAT: “Our Families Count!” rally
WHEN: Thursday, February 9, 2006 1-3pm
WHERE: Indiana Statehouse North Atrium (200 W Washington Street – Indianapolis)
WHO: Indiana Equality & Friends
WHY: Our families are not second-class! The state shouldn’t teach that they are!
Stand up and let your family be counted! Join Indiana Equality at the Statehouse for the “Our Families Count!” rally February 9.

Representatives from many area groups will be on hand. Guest speakers will start at 1:30! We have many great speakers lined up. You won’t want to miss this historic rally for equality!

Continue ReadingMore Indiana State Legislature Attacks on Gay People

Schwarzenegger will veto equal marriage rights bill

Apparently, the will of the people won’t prevail after all. Governor Schwarzenegger is promising to veto the equal marriage rights bill that was just passed in the California legislature.

So let me get this straight… we can’t take our civil rights issues to court, because when the courts make a ruling, they’re called “activist judges” and we’re told that we have to refer to the legislatures to make the laws.

When we go through the legislatures to make the laws, we’re vetoed by activist governors who defy the will of the people.
So basically, there’s no civil rights justice for gay people in America, at all.

I was saying last night that I don’t want to live in America anymore. I don’t feel safe here, either from natural or man-made disaster, or anti-gay attack.

Continue ReadingSchwarzenegger will veto equal marriage rights bill