After receiving top secret clearance, Flat Stanley was shown a report by White House Chief of Staff Andy Card.
Later, Flat Stanley told us that the report contained proof that the 2000 election was fixed, that Bush knew about 9/11 before it happened and let it happen so he could invade Iraq, that Bush helped Enron manipulate the California energy crisis that unseated Gray Davis, and that Bush knew there were no weapons of mass destruction, but invaded anyway to help ensure his buddies at Halliburton could get lucrative government contracts at the expense of the lives of U.S. soldiers.
A few days later Flat Stanley was discovered in the wastebasket beneath a White House paper shredder, cut to ribbons.