Fortune Cookies

You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself.

Executive ability is prominent in your makeup.

You have a keen sense of humor and love a good time.

Drink to your health!

Your luck has been completely changed today.

Put the data you have uncovered to beneficial use.
That’s an interesting if slightly paranoid cookie. I wonder what “data” this is.

People in your background will be more co-operative than usual.

Through greater effort and hard work a precious dream will come true.
And my house will get renovated….

We must always have old memories and young hopes.
in bed.

Your eyes are the windows of your soul – Don’t worry, be happy.
I love a cookie that’s a call back to the 80’s.

The world looks brighter from behind a smile.
They forgot to mention this only works if you’re Pollyanna.

The faith you seek lives within you.
Some cookies are so true you just can’t make fun of them.

You are going to have some new clothes.
See, the perfect fortune cookie. Specific, upbeat, to the point. I immediately went shopping.

You will soon take a very pleasant and successful trip.
That was Vegas, baby!!

Your eyes will be opened to a world full of beauty, charm and adventure.
Again, must have been my trip to Vegas.

Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.
But the real question is, does it have a laugh track?

Life always gets harder near the summit.
So are you saying I’m almost over the hill? Because I don’t know if I like that idea

You will succeed to a fortune.
Hey, I like that one.

May life throw you a pleasant curve.
Geez, and what I really wanted was a knuckle ball.

“You are open-minded and quick to make new friends.”
This is less of a “fortune” cookie, and more of an encouraging “wishful-thinking” type cookie
“In love you could shine as a brilliant star.”
Or, I could be as gooky as a puddle of mud. There’s no telling, really.

“Your eyes will be opened to a world full of beauty, charm, and adventure.”
Hey, I must be going to Disneyworld!

“You are going to have some new clothes”
When I first read this, I thought, no, I’m buying a house, so I can’t shop for clothes. Then I thought, Emperor’s new clothes?
“Life always get’s harder near the summit.”
Like, is that supposed to cheer me up?

Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.
In otherwords, if I’m unhappy, it’s my own fault?

Hands that touch this fortune shall remain young and strong.
Of course, I made everyone touch the fortune. Got to look out for your friends.

Now is the time to try something new.
So much for the retro movement.

Romance is awaiting you soon.
Sure it is. (Update: Turns out it was!)

Every man is a volume if you know how to read him.
Yes, but some people are like physics texts, and others are like a good comic book.

Do not be afraid of computers, be afraid of the lack of them.
What a strange fortune for me to get.

Do not be afraid of computers, be afraid of the lack of them.
No that’s not a mistake, I got the same fortune twice.

In love you could shine as a brilliant star
Hell, in love, I can’t even get a date.

Friends long absent are coming back to you.
Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.
This must be another one of those “bizarro world” cookies
It is the hopes and dreams that we have that makes us great.
No, it’s pursuing and realizing those dreams that make us great.

Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.
An appropriately remonstrative fortune cookie at precisely the moment I needed it. Thanks.