light bulb jokes

How many Bush administration officials does it take to change a light bulb?

  1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed;
  2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed;
  3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb;
  4. One to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of light bulbs;
  5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb;
  6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: Light Bulb Change Accomplished;
  7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark;
  8. One to viciously smear #7;
  9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along;
  10. And finally one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.
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Bush Dimbulbs

How many Bush administration officials does it take to change a light bulb?
None. There’s nothing wrong with that light bulb. There is no need to change anything. We made the right decision and nothing has happened to change our minds. People who criticize this light bulb now, just because it doesn’t work anymore, supported us when we first screwed it in, and when these flip-floppers insist on saying that it is burned out, they are merely giving aid and encouragement to the Forces of Darkness.

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How Many List Members Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?

One to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.
Fourteen to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.
Seven to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.
Seven more to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.
Five to flame the spell checkers.
Three to correct spelling/grammar flames.
Six to argue over whether it’s “lightbulb” or “light bulb” …
Another six to condemn those six as stupid.
Fifteen to claim experience in the lighting industry and give the correct spelling.
Nineteen to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb (or light bulb) forum.
Eleven to defend the posting to the group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this group.
Thirty six to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty.
Seven to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs.
Four to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL.
Three to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group.
Thirteen to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add “Me too”
Five to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.
Four to say “didn’t we go through this already a short time ago?”
Thirteen to say “do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs.”
Three to tell a funny story about their cat and a light bulb.
AND
One group lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now with something unrelated they found at snopes.com and start it all over again!

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