Mom’s Home Cooking

author unknown

A gay man, finally deciding he could no longer hide his sexuality from his parents, went over to their house, and found his mother in the kitchen cooking dinner. He sat down at the kitchen table, let out a big sigh, and said, "Mum, I have something to tell you: I’m gay."

His mother made no reply or gave any response, and the guy was about to repeat it to make sure she’d heard him, when she turned away from the pot she was stirring and said calmly, "You’re gay, doesn’t that mean you have oral sex with other men?"

The guy said nervously, "Uh, yeah, Mum, that’s right."

His mother went back to stirring the pot, then suddenly whirled around and WHACKED him over the head with her spoon and said, "Don’t you EVER complain about the taste of my cooking again!"

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Some lesbian jokes, removed

Author Unknown

Post from February 10, 1996 is REDACTED.

2013 Update: I removed the list that was “funny rules of lesbian living” from this site because I’ve been undergoing a harassment campaign from the woman who claims to have originated the list, threatening me with a cease and desist and threatening to report me to my internet service provider.

She did not write the original list, she merely copied from online sources. If you search USENET under the group soc.women.lesbian-and-bi, you will find several threads from 1988-1989 where people posted these rules back and forth, and in fact you’ll find me contributing to it. In addition, I have an email of the same funny list forwarded to me in 1995, long before Shelly’s book came out.

I actually copied and pasted the list that used to be here from that 1995 email. In February of 1996. Also long before her damned book came out. This site has been around since 1994. Some of us are old, and have grown-up websites. This site actually goes into bars and is able to drink alcohol without me, and never get carded.

Note that I also removed the link to this woman’s book on Amazon.com – which was my way of being nice to her and forwarding people to the book she published of other people’s original content posted online. I’m not going to be nice an send people to buy her work if she sends me threats.

It’s not like the list was that funny, and it contained a lot of unflattering stereotypes of lesbians that, looking back at it, I don’t think I want to have around my site anyway.

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