Kingdom In The Sky

Kingdom In The Sky
by DaVinci’s Notebook
From the album: The Life and Times of Mike Fanning
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All my life I have been searching for that fabled promised land,
With my sisters and my brothers, we shall walk there hand-in-hand.
Through the trials and tribulations, and the devil’s cruel temptations
I know that we’ll all get there one day!
After years and years of wandering, oh, the kingdom we shall find
and the doors might not be open, but we’ll gather in the line.
And our hearts will swell with pride the day those gates swing open wide
and we take a walk down Main Street, USA!
Oh, that Magic Kingdom in the Sky!
We will all be there together by and by!
We will all drink from the fountain and go riding on Space Mountain
When we reach that Magic Kingdom in the Sky!

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I wish it really were The Onion

The news satire paper The Onion is going to need to step it up a notch if they’re going to keep ahead of the ridiculousness of current real news, these days, There are three articles I’ve read this week online that I at first expected to be articles from that paper; turns out they aren’t, which is scary. Or amusing. Or both.
1. Human species ‘may split in two’:

People would become choosier about their sexual partners, causing humanity to divide into sub-species, he added. The descendants of the genetic upper class would be tall, slim, healthy, attractive, intelligent, and creative and a far cry from the “underclass” humans who would have evolved into dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures.

2. Bush seeks to block enemies from space:

President Bush has signed an order asserting the United States’ right to deny adversaries access to space for hostile purposes.
Bush also said the United States would oppose the development of treaties or other restrictions that seek to prohibit or limit U.S. access to or use of space.
…”Freedom of action in space is as important to the United States as air power and sea power,” the policy says. “In order to increase knowledge, discovery, economic prosperity, and to enhance the national security, the United States must have robust, effective, and efficient space capabilities.”

3. U.S. Homeland Security Secretary Michael “Heckuva Job” Chertoff on U. S. dissidents (like me!) “becoming terrorists” through the use of the Internet:

Disaffected people living in the United States may develop radical ideologies and potentially violent skills over the internet and that could present the next major U.S. security threat, U.S. Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said on Monday.
“We now have a capability of someone to radicalize themselves over the internet,” Chertoff said on the sidelines of a meeting of International Association of the Chiefs of Police.
“They can train themselves over the internet. They never have to necessarily go to the training camp or speak with anybody else and that diffusion of a combination of hatred and technical skills in things like bomb-making is a dangerous combination,” Chertoff said. “Those are the kind of terrorists that we may not be able to detect with spies and satellites.”
Chertoff pointed to the July 7, 2005 attacks on London’s transit system, which killed 56 people, as an example a home-grown threat.
To help gather intelligence on possible home-grown attackers, Chertoff said Homeland Security would deploy 20 field agents this fiscal year into “intelligence fusion centers,” where they would work with local police agencies.
By the end of the next fiscal year, he said the department aims to up that to 35 staffers.

Well, as long as they’re all like Michael Brown, I think I’ll be okay.

Continue ReadingI wish it really were The Onion

Here, here! Well-spoken, Bruce!

From a discussion being held by The Poor Man Institute with a wingnut:

The loyalty “owed” a President, or any government official, or any policy of the same, by a private citizen, is this much loyalty: zero. Let me say that again: the loyalty I, or you, or anyone “owes” to someone in the government, or to some course of action they favor, is none whatsoever. To think otherwise, Teddy Roosevelt might comment, is “unpatriotic and servile”. Now, this is not to say you can’t give your loyalty to the President or his policies – it’s a free country, and you can do any non-treasonous thing you want with your loyalty – but that’s your decision, and nobody has to live with it but you (and all the people who suffer from the consequences of your stupid choice of loyalties, of course.) Personally, I think the President is a horrible fucking stupid cunt and his policies are for shit. Your results may vary. But if someone tells me that I “owe” it to the President or his crap policy to act like I don’t think that, well, that person can get in the big long line with WPE and the rest of folks who really desperately need to go fuck themselves.
But Democracy gets even worse. The President and the President’s policies owe me loyalty. The President and his policies are supposed to be working for the good of the country and her people. That’s how the loyalty flows. The President is required to act for my (ok, “our”) benefit; if he does not, the betrayal is his, and the sorts of things which you’d like to call “disloyalty” become duty. Does Gore’s speaking out against torture “undermine” the country? That’s a tricky position to hold if you oppose torture. Does it “undermine” the policy? I wish. No, it does this: it reminds the world that however fucked up our government is, it isn’t us, it doesn’t speak for us, and it can never, ever make us quiet down. And I do say God Bless America.

Continue ReadingHere, here! Well-spoken, Bruce!

Cool bumperstickers and magnets

I clicked through an ad from my site to the Pro-Democrat Progressive Anti-Right Wing Products and had a fun time looking around, so I thought I’d give them an extra plug.
I loved their flag bedecked ribbon magnet that says “Just pretend it’s all okay” and the “F the President” sticker designed like the “W” sticker that everyone has on their cars. Unfortunately, my whole car is taken up already with stickers and magnets, and I already look like a fanatic.

Continue ReadingCool bumperstickers and magnets

Dingell’s HOLIDAY Jingle for O’Reilly and House GOP

Christmas Tree
Christmas Tree

Washington, DC – Congressman John D. Dingell (MI-15) (original link, no longer active – recited the following poem on the floor of the US House of Representatives concerning House Resolution 579, which expressed the sense of the House of Representatives that the symbols and traditions of Christmas should be protected. “Preserving Christmas” has been a frequent topic for conservative talk show hosts, including Fox News’s Bill O’Reilly:

‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the House
No bills were passed ’bout which Fox News could grouse;
Tax cuts for the wealthy were passed with great cheer,
So vacations in St. Barts soon would be near;
Katrina kids were nestled all snug in motel beds,
While visions of school and home danced in their heads;
In Iraq our soldiers needed supplies and a plan,
Plus nuclear weapons were being built in Iran;
Gas prices shot up, consumer confidence fell;
Americans feared we were on a fast track to…well…
Wait— we need a distraction— something divisive and wily;
A fabrication straight from the mouth of O’Reilly
We can pretend that Christmas is under attack
Hold a vote to save it— then pat ourselves on the back;
Silent Night, First Noel, Away in the Manger
Wake up Congress, they’re in no danger!
This time of year we see Christmas every where we go,
From churches, to homes, to schools, and yes…even Costco;
What we have is an attempt to divide and destroy,
When this is the season to unite us with joy
At Christmas time we’re taught to unite,
We don’t need a made-up reason to fight
So on O’Reilly, on Hannity, on Coulter, and those right wing blogs;
You should just sit back, relax…have a few egg nogs!
‘Tis the holiday season: enjoy it a pinch
With all our real problems, do we honestly need another Grinch?
So to my friends and my colleagues I say with delight,
A merry Christmas to all,
and to Bill O’Reilly… Happy Holidays.

Continue ReadingDingell’s HOLIDAY Jingle for O’Reilly and House GOP

Poker with Dick Cheney

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I read this classic blog post from The Poor Man last year when it was first posted, but it’s won some awards since then and I had a chance to re-read it. Check out the whole post, because it’s one of the funniest things you’ll ever read. Unfortunately, the page is screwed up a bit, but scroll down and you’ll see the whole thing.

Judith Miller: Dick Cheney has revealed a straight flush, confirming his pre-collection claims about beating two pair.
TE: Those cards are of different suits. It’s not a flush.
Mark Steyn: When will it end? Now liberal critics complain that Dick Cheney’s cards are not all the same suit. Naturally, these are the same liberals who are always whining about a lack of diversity in higher education. It seems like segregation is OK with these liberals, as long as it damages Republicans.
A witness has come forward claiming that The Editors engage in racial profiling in blog-linking. Developing …
TE: Wait! It’s not even a straight! You’ve got a eight and ten of hearts, a six of clubs, and the seven and five of diamonds. You have a ten high. That’s nothing.

Continue ReadingPoker with Dick Cheney