Who do you hate?

Scott asked the question on his blog. I think it’s probably wrong to feel so strongly about someone that you HATE them, and I try to always give people the benefit of the doubt and to curb my emotions when I can. Sometimes I’m actually successful at that. There are lots of people whom I disliked at one time, but ended up forgiving or finding common ground with over time. But with some people I just can’t get past the bitterness.
I tend to hate people for one of four reasons:
1) They’re pure evil but they’ve convinced themselves (and sometimes others) they’re morally good, and they try to call out others for behavior they engage in themselves. If you’re going to go around harming people, for pete’s sake, be self-aware enough to be open about it. I also dislike people who are evil and open about it, but I have a special loathing for people who are evil and sanctimonious. Hypocritical religious types fall into this category, although I know quite a few gay people who fit here too.
People who fit here: anti-gay religious people, Marla, Wally, Kathy S., the “Nerd Herd” from Big Brother 6.
2) People (usually gay men, but not always) who are constantly bitchy queens for no reason. There are times when being bitchy is highly appropriate, but generally looking down on and snarking on everyone, whether they’ve done something to you or not, is tiresome and stupid and will eventually get a smackdown from me.
People who fit here: Josh, the new pal of one of my oldest friends. He’s cruising for a vicious bruising. And not in the good way.
3) Authoritarian assholes and people drunk on power. The only people who get to tell me what to do are my bosses at work, and that’s just because they pay me. And even then I undermine authority whenever I get the chance.
People who fit here: George Bush, several people from Indiana Equality, a guy named Carter, various people who live in my neighborhood.
4) People who seem pleasant but I still instinctively dislike when I meet them. Usually I find out later that they fall into one of the above categories.

This Post Has 7 Comments

  1. lisa

    my criteria for hate tends to revolve around the number of people affected by the person’s actions. i hate ronald reagan for allowing the aids epidemic to gain a foothold here, when it could have been stemmed, and i hate george bush for starting unjustified wars and attempting to overturn roe v. wade, and generally bringing his “mission from god” stance to his presidency.

  2. Kay

    The older I get the shorter my list becomes. Basically, I’m down to just two:
    1.) Gossips
    2.) Gossipmongers
    And, no, I’m not naming names as there couldn’t possibly be enough bite space available…

  3. Bil Browning

    Well I hope I’m not one of the people from IE that you hate… There’s not that many of us honestly, so if you hate several that means my chances are pretty high… 🙁

  4. Steph Mineart

    No, Bil, you’re definitely not; I think you’re a great guy. I can’t get past some of the other people that I know are associated with IE, though. I’m sorry about that, but it’s the case.

  5. Stephen Nulty

    I’d like to think I don’t HATE anyone, but yesterday here in the UK (13th October) was the 80th birthday of Margaret Thatcher (prime minister of the UK 1979-1990). I woke up, turned on the TV news and was beseiged with images and clips of Thatcher, and found myself thinking “She must be dead!” Then found myself WISHING she was dead! Margaret Thatcher provokes deep feelings of hatred (and love) in this country, there doesn’t seem to be anywhere in between the two extremes. I was 13 when she became prime minister, ignorant of her policies and ideologies that were to have such a dramatic effect on this country and everyone in it for years to come. I was 32 when, in 1997, her conservative government (and that of her successor John Major) were finally ousted from power by Tony Blair’s Labour pary. In those 19 years I learned how to hate – at least when it came to Margaret Thatcher…

  6. Jerame Davis

    Steph, I hope you’re feelings about certain folks involved with IE won’t color the future. People and organizations are different. People come and go, but organizations tend to endure. There has been a lot of change within IE lately and the vast majority of it has been positive. While some of the folks you mentioned specifically are still there, others may have left by now.
    In the next few years we’re going to need the support of everyone in the community. Like or not, IE is best suited to do the heavy lifting in regard to battling this anti-equality marriage amendment.
    *kisses* Thanks for being such a great stop on the information superhighway!

  7. Steph Mineart

    Jerame: This is how I look at it. Getting the Human Rights Ordinance passed and defeating SJR7 are of paramount importance for the GLBT community. Indiana Equality is one of several organizations working toward those two goals. As a member of that community, it’s my responsibility to try to help those several organizations where I can, and to not hinder any of them.
    I strongly feel that the intra-community feuding over the last 10 years has put us at quite a disadvantage towards meeting our goals, and I don’t want to be a party to that anymore, for all of our sakes.
    That being said, my feelings about Indiana Equality were formed over a long period of time based on a number of different factors, one of them being some of the people involved. I don’t want to go into detail, because I feel I don’t have to. I have a right to my feelings, and I know they’re valid, and I don’t need to justify them to anyone, especially here on my site, which is my turf.
    In other words: I’m going to bite my tongue, for the good of the GLBT community so we can all work towards the HRO and against SJR7. But I will be watching everything, and taking notes.

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