Ain’t Kids A Gas?

by Henry W. Farkas

True story, from a co-worker, today:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? I hope you remember my story when they start getting frustrated.

My three year old son had a lot of problems with potty training, and I was on his case constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven month old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Matt had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him, and he said "No". I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident and I don’t have any clothes with me. Then I said, "Matt, are you sure you did not have an accident?" "No," he replied, but I knew that he must have, because the smell was getting worse.


I asked one more time, "Matt, did you have an accident?" This time, with a little smirk on his face, he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled: "SEE MOM, IT’S JUST GAS!!" While 100 people nearly choked to death on their tacos, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down to eat his food as if nothing happened.

I was mortified, but some kind elderly people made me feel a lot better, when they came over and thanked me for the best laugh they had ever had.

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