Posts Tagged: gay jokes

An Honest Lesbian Relationship – YouTube

It’s funny. But sort of painfully true. That bit about Ikea smarts just a little, given our recent assemblages. 🙂 As funny as it is, though, not all gay relationships work this way, any more than all straight marriages end in divorce. This may be clever, but it’s ultimately self-defeating to think this way.

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Queer Quotes

Why can’t they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand guys with M16s going, “Who’d you call a faggot?” — Jon Stewart

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Etiquette Tips For The Gay Male Wedding

1. On the day of a gay wedding, it’s bad luck for the two grooms to see each other at the gym. 2. Superstition suggests that for good luck the couple should have something bold, something flirty, something trashy, something dirty. 3. It’s customary at gay and lesbian nuptials for the parents to have an

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100 Best Things About Being a Gay Man

1. You truly don’t care who Julia Roberts is sleeping with. 2. You understand the difference between 43 brands of imported vodka. 3. You can call anyone "honey" including pets. 4. You know someone who definitely was in the emergency room with Richard Gere and the gerbil. 5. You understand the immense importance of good

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The Gay Genie

A gay man was walking along the beach at Fire Island when he stumbled upon a Genie’s lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold, out popped a gay genie.

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Having My Baby…

Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm, then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. Two dozen babies are in the ward, 23 of which are crying and screaming. One, over in the corner, is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by,

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The Gay Agenda

I know that many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Fallwell and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no one has ever seen a copy of it. Well, I have finally obtained a copy directly from the Head Homosexual. It follows below: 6:00 am Gym 8:00 am Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites) 9:00

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Attention All Heterosexual Men!

Are you disillusioned by your lifestyle? Do you want more from life besides monster truck shows? Do Budweiser commercials confuse you? Are you tired of being a year behind in fashion? Do you wish you had a nice apartment like the ones you see on "Will & Grace"? YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Act now, and

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FABULAIR … Blueprint For The First Gay Airline

Author Unknown Welcome Aboard The Fabulair experience begins when you call our reservations number, 900-FLY-FABU. We know you can make reservations on other airlines for free. But our 900 number is only 28c/minute (50% of all proceeds go to the Human Rights Campaign), and our reservationists are very good on the phone. Your tickets will

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Can’t Fly if You’re Gay

Author Unknown An employee of USAir with the last name of Gay boarded a USAir flight with a free travel voucher. Soon after he sat down, someone else came and claimed he had the same seat assignment, so Mr. Gay moved down do an empty seat. Soon after that the airplane began to fill up.

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Careful When Playing Golf

Author Unknown Two lesbians were out playing golf. They tee off and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left. One of them finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes a mighty swing at the ball. She hits a beautiful second shot, but

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Ken’s Letter To Santa

Dear Santa, I understand that one of my colleagues has petitioned you for changes in her contract, specifically asking for anatomical and career changes. In addition, it is my understanding that disparaging remarks were made about me, my ability to please, and some of my fashion choices. I would like to take this opportunity to

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Barbie’s Letter to Santa

Author Unknown Dear Santa, Listen you fat little troll, I’ve been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid weather, and drowning in fake tea from one too many tea parties, and I hate to break it to ya Santa, but IT’S DEFINITELY PAYBACK TIME!

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Some lesbian jokes, removed

Author Unknown Post from February 10, 1996 is REDACTED. 2013 Update: I removed the list that was “funny rules of lesbian living” from this site because I’ve been undergoing a harassment campaign from the woman who claims to have originated the list, threatening me with a cease and desist and threatening to report me to

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Huntin’ Bears

Frank was excited about his new rifle. So, he went bear hunting. He spotted a small brown bear and shot it. There was then a tap on his shoulder, and he turned round to see a big black bear.

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